Monday, February 1, 2016

Lives of the Rich and Famous

Sept 15, 2015

Its a glamorous life that I lead.

6:10 am - Move Tag out of our bed back to his bed for the 3rd time.  Make the bed over the snot and milk stain in the sheets.

7:05 am - Colt dropped the box containing his bug collection for 1st grade science.  I recollect the dead bugs and discover that one large grasshopper is less dead than expected.

7:15 am - Dash swears that he will not go to school unless the dog poo he stepped on yesterday is completely cleaned off of his new high top sneakers.  I take the sneaker and a push pin onto the back porch and systematically scrape the mess out of a complicated tread pattern.  I will not be finishing my breakfast.

8:00 am - Sport comes out of the bathroom and describes his bowel movement in detail finishing up with the announcement that some of it is mysteriously stuck to the side of the toilet bowl.  I try multiple flushes, dumping in a bucket of water and then finally resort to using the toilet brush that I immediately throw away in the outside garbage.

10:13 am - Sis coughs so hard she throws up on the ground.

It's going to be a great day!!


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